"Leave all your love and loving behind"
January 17, 2011 § 3 Comments
Is the third Monday of the month too late for a 2010 recap entry (see 2009’s review here)? Ah, well, blame it on the new zodiac sign. It was a semi-sweet year – full of some deep-shit soul searching, weight gain, sleepless nights, the laziest of lazy summer days, another cross-country road trip, weight loss, anxiety attacks about my future, and subsequent weight gain. I learned that, despite my best efforts, I do not have my shit together, and that I am a bigger mess than I had feared. I also learned that the world does not end when you throw away your lifelong plans, that you can always find a way out and start over, but only if you want to. Other things I’ve learned?
1. Apologies are meaningless if you continue to make the same mistakes.
2. The eating habits you acquire in college will be harder to break than you think. I was spoiled living at home, with my Omma’s delicious cooking, non-plastic utensils, and lack of foods involving the microwave. The day I returned to Seattle, I was back to eating dry cereal out of the box and buying Cup Noodles in bulk.
3. Irregularity. What a shitty problem to have.
4. One of the best things about returning to Seattle? Return of the late night happy hour. New favorites? Barrio and Nijos.
5. Must keep an active reminder that my current lifestyle (i.e., work) does not allow for the capacity of a puppy. I can hardly manage to take care of myself. I am not responsible enough for a puppy. Even one with a face like this:
6. I admit I can be temperamental psycho. But it doesn’t stop me now, does it?
7. People who love and care for you will continue to do so, despite your worst qualities and your most disastrous mistakes. These are the people who will tolerate your oddest quirks. They are the ones who will remain patient and supportive as you get your shit together. They are the ones who will remind you not to walk out of the house with toothpaste on the side of your face. And they will do so free of asterisks and expectations of reciprocation.
8. Is there no hope for any of us?
9. I am maniacally protective over my friends and loved ones (I would use a metaphor involving a mama grizzly, but some moron already did that). No one is ever good enough. And I will come after you if you screw any of them over. A meat cleaver will be involved.
10. Jewel was right. In the end, only kindness matters.
11. Often times, the most pragmatic choices make the least sense. Sometimes, even the promise of a cushy life isn’t enough to calm the protests of the soul. It took me 20-something years, thousands of dollars in tuition, and literal blood, sweat, and tears (and occasional vomit – thanks Harborview ER!) for me to realize that I didn’t want to spend the rest of my life living a façade. When you start hating yourself more than your job, then it’s time for a change. I’m doing just that.
12. Costco: where practicality and romance come together.
13. Family. We’re a good type of dysfunctional. I think.
14. Sometimes, your friends will know you better than you know yourself. When I announced that I would not pursue a medical career, and instead, attempt to become a writer, the overwhelming response was not “whaaaaaaat?”, but instead, “I knew it!”. It’s an incredible feeling to know your ambitions are recognized and supported.
15. People are rarely hopeless. They are merely difficult.
soopastryheart 
awww. i love.
Poop mouth…
Your posts get more and more uplifting as time passes. I think something is going right 😉
Thanks for including my bday mission <3
Glad to have been a part of your tumultuous but fruitful 2010. Now, let's kick 2011's ass.